One small step for God, one giant leap for me
The weather's been amazing lately. Sometimes I feel like God forgets about our humidity dial, but not this week. Fall is here and it brings with it sweet relief. My heart is aching right now with thoughts of the previous year and the future months in Italy. I turned in my intent to vacate my apartment at the very last minute and with much hesitation. My lease will come to an end on Dec 1 and while I thought of doing a month-to-month lease, the fact of the matter is that I can not afford it. I'm going to try to sub lease for the months of December and January. I'm praying God will provide a place for me.The first three months I hated it here. Not knowing anyone, feeling alone, and annoyed every friday night when the bass turned up and the booze went down... Now I love it. The huge trees that remind of one of my favorite books, Anne of Green Gables, the guy who sits on his porch, plays guitar, and sings in the most awful voice I've ever heard, even the ridiculously tan man who lays by the pool and stares at himself while flexing his muscles....really, whats not to love? Needless to say the past year has been hard, but oh so great. And now that I've finally gotten used to the change that came so abruptly, it's time to move on.
The past week, my mind has been filled with doubt about Italy. I'm nervous about what I will do when I get back. Nervous about quitting my job, and about finding health insurance that I can afford after I get out of school. Nervous about where I will live and what the heck I'll be doing when I get back. What if I hate it, I'm stuck there for four months no matter what.
I'm afraid of uncertainty and that's why I am here... at this point... in my life. So I will learn to not lean on my own understanding, but to step out in faith in the One who made me, who sustains me.
On a side note, pray for my amazing friend Michelle who is appling to be a journey for the International Mission Board. I haven't talked to her lately, but she has been on my heart a lot.
The past week, my mind has been filled with doubt about Italy. I'm nervous about what I will do when I get back. Nervous about quitting my job, and about finding health insurance that I can afford after I get out of school. Nervous about where I will live and what the heck I'll be doing when I get back. What if I hate it, I'm stuck there for four months no matter what.
I'm afraid of uncertainty and that's why I am here... at this point... in my life. So I will learn to not lean on my own understanding, but to step out in faith in the One who made me, who sustains me.
On a side note, pray for my amazing friend Michelle who is appling to be a journey for the International Mission Board. I haven't talked to her lately, but she has been on my heart a lot.
posted by Nicole Michelle | 6:40 PM
3 Comments:
I'm SOOOOO PROUD of you! I can attest to God's faithfulness. I've been scared like you describe. I've wondered about the future. I've been anxious, etc. But, Sweetie, IT REALLY DOES ALWAYS WORK OUT. GOD REALLY DOES ALWAYS PROVIDE AND COME THROUGH. You will LOVE ITALY -- at first maybe not, but you will fall in love with the place. And then your decision will be whether or not you want to come home! I cried the first month at college in Austin -- wondered what I had done. I cried all the way to Africa, but then I didn't want to come home. I cried all the way to California, too! But I've never regretted any of my travels or adventures. You won't either, I don't think. Did you read Eat, Pray, Love? She's not a Christian, but she does an excellent job describing her travels and how they enrich her life.
Love you so much! When are you supposed to go to Italy?
hey so you are going to Italy? What? Tell me more. Like hwere at and when and if you need a buddy?
Yeah, I'm going to Italy next February through June. It's through the IMB. I'll go ahead and call my partner to let her know you'll be coming instead :)
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